Sparkly Onesies: Dancing with the Stars: Evan Lysacek

We apologize for the uncharacteristic delay between posts. However, we're now both totally done with school for the year, so you can expect more frequent commentary from us.

Week One.

Viennese Waltz: I'll Be by Edwin McCain

Anna looks absolutely fantastic in this dress, but we're not big fans of Evan wearing tails. For some reason, we like him so much better in casual clothes than formal wear, but we recognize that's not really an option on Dancing with the Stars. We will always hate Evan's hair slicked back like that. It really ages him.

Week Two.

Jive: Best Damn Thing by Avril Lavigne

These costumes are ridiculous, but we like them anyway. The pink socks are seriously endearing, and for once Evan had an excuse to wear his hair that way.

Week Three.

Quickstep: Hot Honey Rag from Chicago

We're pretty much in love with Anna's hair. Her dress is amazing, but her hair is just so adorable. Evan's suit is a bit too big on him and we think his slicked hair looks even more severe here.

Week Four.

Tango: Wait a Minute by The Pussycat Dolls

Anna looks fierce. We feel like we should hate those straps, but somehow, we love them. We don't get why Evan's belt is so wide. This was the week his neckline started to creep lower, paving the way for some unfortunate chest shots later.

Week Five.

Rumba: I Don't Want to Miss a Thing from Armageddon
Elle had to watch this dance three times before she could actually pay attention to what Evan was doing, just because she couldn't take her eyes off of Anna. We're pretty sure it's part of her strategy. She distracts the judges by having great hair and wearing shiny dresses and they only notice Evan when he forgets to point his toes.

Week Six.

Samba: Comanche by The Revels
How much make-up do you think Evan puts on his chest? It looks plastic, and with his tan he looks like a Ken doll. And even though we love Anna, that hair is not good for her.

Swing Marathon: In the Mood by Ernie Fields & His Orchestra
Cute. We like the suspenders.

Week Seven.

Argentine Tango: Bust Your Windows by Jazmine Sullivan
By this point in the show, tuxedo + slicked back hair has been established as the basic Evan look. This tuxedo is better tailored than some of the previous ones, but the hair really, really needs to go.

Cha-Cha-Cha: Holiday by Madonna
Put on a shirt, boys.

Week Eight.

Waltz: Open Arms by Journey
Evan's hair is so much better like this. If it wants it styled and out of his face, this is how he should do it. And he buttoned his shirt! Anna looks gorgeous, as usual.

Futuristic Cha-Cha-Cha: Bulletproof by La Roux

These costumes reminded Elle of a story. When we were both teenagers, we watched Blade Runner together at summer camp. Bee got inspired and showed up a few hours later with robot eye makeup smeared across her face. So it should surprise no one that Bee loves Anna's Leeloo costume like crazy and wishes she could rock it. Evan's hair looks really great. Elle found him attractive during this dance, which is rare. The one thing we don't understand is why Evan said he was shy about showing his nipples in this costume, since we all already saw them at Skate America this past season. Evan's nipples and mesh are practically old friends at this point.

Week Nine.